My struggles continue.................

Hello Gary,
Thank you for sharing your day's update ...
The Yin and Yang of upbeat excitement with positive anticipation, for with as you say ... a feel for being "in" ...
all while coping through a day that you define as it feeling the worse beyond the regiment.
Thankful to your "gf" and Mom being able to concur with your interpretation.
I am definitely not in a position other than to hope that should your Lead Doctor be on the same opinion
as you in regard to amputation, that it would be initially followed with a referral for someone to talk to.
(if not, I strongly feel you are entitled to ask for it).

Wishing your day today and each that follows to
not be found as the worse (on the Yin)
and then become the Best one ever (on the Yang)
 
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The hardest part is waiting for the call...……….

The amputation I am well centered on. This has been a consideration since January. While no longer a life saving option, I am tired of daily pain and the wrapping, lotioning etc. The time spent cleaning my arm in the shower...……. So I'm willing to take some inconvenience and phantom pain for what would remain in my life. I find it hard to conceive it being any or significantly worse. With luck it would be better and that is what I am looking for, the least pain before MAID.

Lesson learned today- it snowed last night. I was able to get my arm through the sleeve of my parka. But sweating while exercising was not good. The salt just notches the pain a magnitude or two!

Cheers,

Garry
 
I was in favour of amputation as a life saving option when this was first mentioned

I sat down and went through the living without an arm for a week, when activities were performed, not fun but better than the alternative as the saying goes

there is a guy cuzzinjack who got his leg above the knee done and will try to provide you a link to a thread where u can contact him, sure he would give some guidance as he went through an amputation and will try to find his email or pm address

you say it is not a life savings operation now just to relieve the pain and day to day nuisance what has changed if that is ok to ask?

you know my heart is in the right place even if the words are not clear or even close to perfect
Jeff
 
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Hey Jeff!

Dashing through the snow at your place??

Well, the team of doctors was never in favour of amputation from the get go. In their experience it did not change the outcome for the patient. All this time the cancer had been localized to my arm, never elsewhere. Then in July we found a tumor on the back of my left shoulder, the first time we found a tumor outsider of my arm. I was devastated to be honest as I had considered for some reason the cancer could not spread from my arm due to the lymphedema or just good luck. One of the first things one of the doctors told me was "Good thing we didn't amputate your arm".

I had this tumor removed along with the two largest on my arm on July 24th.

The problem with the PET scans is that they won't light up a tumor until it reaches 1 cm in size, maybe it can't absorb enough radioactive sugar to show up on the screen.

So while we know there was at least one tumor outside of my arm I'm sure the smart money would say there must be more.

So I don't approach the amputation in terms of saving my life, but just hopefully making my life more comfortable as the cancer runs its course.

Please send the link if you find it. I spent the morning reading about the experiences of amputees and like I said, I just tire of the pain every day all day and the smell and the dressing. If this treatment doesn't work and there are no other options then I will try to go with having as enjoyable a remaining life as I am able.

I've just formed the opinion that it has to be better and I'll learn how to tie my shoe laces one handed...……..I worry about falling and trying to catch myself with my missing left hand too!!

This ought to be a great day, conformation I'm in the trial, maybe get the needle too and my son is with me again - yippie!!1

Cheers,

Garry
 
Garry. I just found and read this thread. I had no idea.... I just called Cathy to give her this news. She remembers you. I told her about another Peace River CCF member that I had chatted with back in the day.

I need to tell you (almost) everyone has been deeply touched by cancer one way or the other and I find you an inspiration, a rock .... and I'd like to think I could be as brave as you.
 
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Don't worry I remember you and your daughter as well. Glad to hear you got new wheels by the way.

I look at from a simple point of view. Let it roll over me or make the best of it. Thank God I have a son, partner and such great parents and of course friends and CCF crew that help to boost me through my days.

Yeh it is not the situation that I'd like to find myself in but I tell myself I should have died from the cancer I had 11 years ago too. Maybe longshots are my thing?!It is surprising where you find the resolve to carry on.

Still I wish I would have had news yesterday, the waiting is the most challenging right now. Like current thoughts of did something suddenly turn up that is causing them to rethink if I am a suitable candidate?????

But I take a deep breath, things to do, arm to wrap, exercise to get done, son to have breakfast with. Life does have to go on!

Cheers,

Garry
 
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Ah. You do remember too .... :cool: You may have met her, she works at Mint in the valley .... at the back counter if you know what I mean ....

The new car; yes, it is much better than what I had imagined. Seriously! Everything is so refined then with a flick of the throttle it will bite! A wonderful machine. What makes it so much better is Cathy is on board 100% and is enjoying the car .... well, enjoying my ..... enjoyment .... I guess? :Biggrin: Anyway its all good and when the "real" snow flies I can always pull the cover off and dream for an early spring.

.... as for the snow; my daughter says it has already melted in Peace River. Thank goodness!
 
First things first. I"M IN!!!!! I GOT SELECTED! I START ON THURSDAY THE 20TH! HOPE ONCE AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh yeah, I never forget a northerner! And a former yellow Corvette owner to boot. The snow sucked to be sure especially without an acre off yet but time is not critical for that yet.

I'd love the rev matching in my car, that sounds soooooo cool!

Wow the relief is just flooding through my body. I almost regret that I don't drink. I mean the odds are not good it is going to work in the end but it is better than proceeding directly to the amputation. Like all people we clutch onto hope. And three months is not too long to wait. I have to stop imiquimoding (the lotion) but I hope that things won't get too crazy with tumor growth in the mean time.

Not sure if I am in the needle group yet or not but at least I get the first treatment medication...…………

Thanks everyone! The journey continues! God take mercy on this poor guy please.

Cheers,

Garry-
 
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... things good about "my" day today ...

- it has not snowed where I am :Hurray:
- I'm finally getting some things completed at work
- there's meat on the menu for supper tonight :joyful:
- I get to BBQ the meat and therefore have a Beer (... antifreeze ...)
- tomorrow is Friday
- I am planning a visit with a couple of good friends on Saturday
- Garry is "IN" :Woohoo:
- etc, etc, etc

footnote: the above is not in any particular order :thumbs:
So Happy for Garry today
 
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I know what goes through the mind when health issues hit a guy, been dealing with family and myself for ahwile now and it ain't easy.
Velocity , don't know if you ever heard of or even would believe in such stuff, but it can't hurt and worth looking into my opinion. She's a friend and been doing energy healing for many years, she in minutes took away unbearable pain my dad had after his surgery that the docs could do nothing. A old native trapper from up north heard of her and came down as a last resort to see if she could help him. His leg was infected bad, they were going to amputate it in a week. So she worked on him , he waited and didn't go in to get it cut off, I don't know how many treatments or how long, but it was several years later he was still alive walking on his leg no wheel chair or crutches , healed ! There are hundreds of positive stories. All she does is touch certain points on the body. She don't prescribe pills or twist you or anything. She talks away steady , you can even talk about cars or bikes during the session as her hubby has a body shop and builds cars, they even ride bike to Sturgis. No guarentee but it don't hurt to try. There may be someone close to you there that does this too..can check her site out. bhenergyhealing.com , get well, don't give up.
 
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