billy bob and the trooper.
- Thread starter buckhorn76
- Start date
OK everyone ...
it's time to get the equipment tuned up and ready for Spring Corvette Detailing ...
it's time to get the equipment tuned up and ready for Spring Corvette Detailing ...
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Lol. I believe that’s the Forest Lawn Superstore.
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President's Choice might be a "Real Canadian" Superstore ("Stupidstore") ... I'm not certain but know why I don't shop there now ... OMG 
Hey lets meet up at Alexanders for a beer. Four o'clock sharp, park out front...
That’s 5 tons of accident right there!
Two heavyweights fighting it out.
Graham
Two heavyweights fighting it out.
Graham
And the two drivers are commiserating thru the doors straight ahead ... 
...
Those were the days
...Those were the days
It's been declared a matter
of National Security that
CHILDRENS TOYS are
required to be
MADE in the USA ...
of National Security that
CHILDRENS TOYS are
required to be
MADE in the USA ...
>>> *They're Back! Those wonderful Church Bulletins! Thank God for the
>>> church ladies with typewriters. These sentences actually appeared in
>>> church bulletins or were announced at church services: **
>>> **--------------------------**
>>> **
>>> *The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.*
>>> *-------------------------- ***
>>> **
>>> **Scouts****are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be
>>> recycled Proceeds will be used to cripple children. **
>>> *--------------------------***
>>> **
>>> **The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water. 'The sermon
>>> tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.' **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of
>>> those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving
>>> obvious pleasure to the congregation. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a
>>> nursery downstairs. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Next Thursday there will be try-outs for the choir. They need all
>>> the help they can get. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the
>>> church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall.
>>> Music will follow. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is
>>> Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of
>>> several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased
>>> person you want remembered.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **The church will host an evening of fine dining, super
>>> entertainment and gracious hostility. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Pot-luck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind.
>>> They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park
>>> across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation
>>> would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next
>>> Sunday. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM . Please
>>> use the back door. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the
>>> Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to
>>> attend this tragedy.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian
>>> Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance. **
>>> *--------------------------***
>>> **/And this one just about sums them all up/**
>>> **
>>> **The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan
>>> last Sunday:**
>>> **'I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours.'*
>>> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
>>> church ladies with typewriters. These sentences actually appeared in
>>> church bulletins or were announced at church services: **
>>> **--------------------------**
>>> **
>>> *The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.*
>>> *-------------------------- ***
>>> **
>>> **Scouts****are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be
>>> recycled Proceeds will be used to cripple children. **
>>> *--------------------------***
>>> **
>>> **The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water. 'The sermon
>>> tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.' **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of
>>> those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving
>>> obvious pleasure to the congregation. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a
>>> nursery downstairs. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Next Thursday there will be try-outs for the choir. They need all
>>> the help they can get. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the
>>> church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall.
>>> Music will follow. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is
>>> Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of
>>> several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased
>>> person you want remembered.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **The church will host an evening of fine dining, super
>>> entertainment and gracious hostility. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Pot-luck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind.
>>> They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park
>>> across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation
>>> would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next
>>> Sunday. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM . Please
>>> use the back door. **
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the
>>> Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to
>>> attend this tragedy.**
>>> *--------------------------*
>>> ****
>>> **Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian
>>> Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance. **
>>> *--------------------------***
>>> **/And this one just about sums them all up/**
>>> **
>>> **The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan
>>> last Sunday:**
>>> **'I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours.'*
>>> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
What A Guy!
A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the Cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You’re just like Frank."
Passenger : "Who?"
Cabbie : "Frank Feldman. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab; things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."
Passenger : "There are always a few clouds over everybody."
Cabbie : "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."
Passenger : "Sounds like he was really something special."
Cabbie : "There’s more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman could do everything right."
Passenger : "Wow, what a guy!"
Cabbie : ‘He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if
she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man!. He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."
Passenger : "How did you meet him?"
Cabbie : "I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his wife.
A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the Cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You’re just like Frank."
Passenger : "Who?"
Cabbie : "Frank Feldman. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab; things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time."
Passenger : "There are always a few clouds over everybody."
Cabbie : "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy."
Passenger : "Sounds like he was really something special."
Cabbie : "There’s more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman could do everything right."
Passenger : "Wow, what a guy!"
Cabbie : ‘He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back even if
she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man!. He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."
Passenger : "How did you meet him?"
Cabbie : "I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his wife.
Ok I gave a couple of old guys a hard time starting their vacuums (above)
... so let’s give some equal time to the legacy of their young men ...
... so let’s give some equal time to the legacy of their young men ...
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And now for a little advice from Herman (1965)
Makes me think of myself, especially when he says he is handsome. LOLGreat Vid Richard.Words of wisdom that everyone should heed.
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