Eric, could you mail me a Bison bone or something that I could crazy glue onto a rib eye? Might look authentic enough.
In reference to Al's comment Number 4. I do not own a smoker, yes people will probably think less of me if that is possible. Smoked meat, cheese, brakes, tires, clutches and what not is a flavour I have ever liked. Don't even like the smell of it.
Now that the dream has been shattered, I will take the Go Fund Me page down (thanks to the donor who gave me 6 cents, it was a solid start) and look for alternatives. Maybe I need to think of some type of vegan dish.